Wednesday, July 6, 2011

I'm so glad I got married before Facebook took over the world


I was just reading a post on a fellow blogger's site about going on dates, and how awkward it is to try and ignore someone when they can call your cell phone, text you, email you or make things uncomfortable for you online.  How true!

It's almost too easy to stalk somebody nowadays.  You can just Facebook stalk them, follow them on Twitter or put a trace on them - there's actual tracking apps for smart phones.  Creepy, right?    What happened to the good old days, when you rode around at night for hours with your friend, hoping to spot your love interest leaving work, or at their favorite bar, then followed them home and sat outside their house for hours?  Not that I did that, mind you.  I was usually the best bud who was dragged along for the stakeout and had to occasionally mumble words of encouragement like "I'm sure he just hasn't called you back because his phone died" or "No, I don't think he would be creeped out if he realized we were sitting outside his house at midnight."  I hated lying because I was quite sure whichever guy it was we were stalking would absolutely file a restraining order against my friend had they discovered us. 

When Hubs and I first started dating, Facebook was around but not yet the social monster it is now.  Myspace was popular, but neither of us spent a great deal of time online.  We managed to date for several months before the rest of the world knew about it.  Now, of course, I have around 600 photos on my Facebook and over 500 "friends" (mostly former classmates) who know basically every outing we go on, which movies I've seen recently and what I do in my free time. 

Sometimes I'm concerned with the amount of personal information shared on Facebook and other social sites.  Sure, we can set our privacy settings at the maximum levels, but we're still giving out a massive amount of info to everyone.

Apparently the new big thing in dating is the relationship status.  Changing your status from "single" to "in a relationship" is the cause of excessive stress and worry.  You don't want to change it too soon, because you might freak out the person you're dating.  However, if you don't change it soon enough, they may think you're dating other people.  I guess it's inappropriate to ask the person you're dating, "Hey, do you think we're at a point where we can change our Facebook statuses now?"  How ridiculous.  My dad has a Facebook and is married, and he decided to see what would happen if he changed his status from "Married" to "It's Complicated."  His page blew up.  Within a few hours every person on his friend list had either written on his wall, messaged him or called his phone.  Granted he only has 36 friends, but still.  Think of the possible damage that could be done to one's personal life. 

Because I have two teenage sisters and an eighteen-year-old cousin, I am Facebook friends with twenty or thirty other teenagers.  I read their posts and stay frustrated with them because they're so dramatic all the time.  They whine about everything.   "Mom won't let me go out tonight.  FML."  "Nothing good ever happens to me."  "I hate everyone."  "Life sucks."  Blah blah blahbety blah. 

What's worse, though, is the relationship drama that goes on.    Remember when you would be dating someone, and would find out he'd been seeing another girl?  Did you go online and write dirty messages so everyone could see she was a skank?  Oh no, indeed.  You went to where that hooker hung out, called her out and beat the mess out of her.  That's how drama was handled in my day.  Now these kids will call each other every name under the sun for hours on end, talking big and letting the entire world know all of their business.  However, let them see each other in public somewhere, and what do they do?  Walk right past each other, not saying a word.  Where's your big britches now, honey? 

Another beef I have with kids is that they have no idea what a serious relationship is.  Today they LOVE Brad, but tomorrow they hate him and LOVE John, and so on and so forth.  Let me give you a tip, kid:  If you LOVE one guy today, chances are you won't LOVE someone else tomorrow.  It's more of a lasting thing.  A few months, at least.  Oh and you can't date someone for a week and be in love with them.  You don't even know them! 

Okay, I think I've ranted on that enough. 

If Hubs and I ever divorce, I don't know what I'll do.  I don't think I could handle social dating.  It's too complicated and ridiculous.    Although I'm sure it will be easier to meet single dudes!


  1. I am always floored by the crazy stuff people put on facebook. I'm guilty of having two - mostly because I don't want clients/bosses/coworkers seeing shots of me at the beach, but family and friends doesn't bother me. I'm not a fan of airing dirty laundry over the net though. Totally ridiculous.

    I always tell my husband he's not allowed to die before me, because I'm really not interested in going back to the dating world. I'd rather end up being a crazy cat lady than fretting over facebook relationship status updates...

  2. Damn this hit home with me I can so relat to all you said here I also get annoyed when I see the words "I'm bored" on Facebook all the time my daugter has a habit of posting it as her status and I think how on earth can you be bored.......I very rarely get bored in fact I can not remember the last time I was bored I always have somehting going on in my life.............