I heart LSU Football

It's the most wonderful time of the year:

FOOTBALL SEASON

More specifically, COLLEGE football season.  Wohoo!  I love the Saints, but it's not even remotely close to the love and affection I feel for my Tigers.

This about sums it up:


I'm so excited and distracted that it would be pointless to attempt to write a specific post today. 

Besides, you don't need to be on the computer right now anyway.  You should be watching ESPN or, more specifically, ABC at 7pm central time tonight.  That's what I'll be doing. 

GEAUX TIGERS!  Rawr.

Fantabulous Friday

First off:

He's still got it!

That was in honor of THE END OF THE WEEK.  We made it! It's Fantabulous Friday, baby! Wohoo!

For today's totally fantabulous subject, I have decided to share with y'all my favorite spoof movies of all time.  Some of them might not technically be classified as spoofs, but trust me, they are.  I know these things...

So, here they are:

Best cop spoof:

The Naked Gun

I know many of y'all would say, "Nuh-uh, Police Academy is the best spoof movie!"  However, you would be mistaken.  The Police Academy movies are specifically comedy genre.  What's the difference?  I really don't know.  I'm just a huge Leslie Nielsen fan.  Plus, you can watch OJ back before he went psycho killer on us.  (Yes, I'm aware he was found not guilty.  My mother still maintains that he was framed.  Haha.)

BEST Star Wars spoof:

Spaceballs

We all know Mel Brooks is the KING of spoof.  I mean, really, the man's a genius. 

Mel Brooks, Rick Moranis, John Candy, Bill Pullman, Joan Rivers, Dick Van Patten - you can't beat a cast like that!  Even (sometimes especially) hardcore Star Wars fans love this film.  I wish they'd make a sequel....with the same cast, of course (and honor John Candy somehow or other in a humorous way).




Best Robin Hood spoof:

Men in Tights

Mel Brooks combined the talent of Cary Elwes, Richard Lewis, Tracy Ullman, Dick Van Patton (again), Dave Chappelle.....how could he go wrong?  This movie is hilarious, from the one-liners to the dance numbers.







Best Horror Spoof:

Scream

This movie is one of my all-time favorites.  I'm a big 'ol chicken, so making fun of scary movies is sort of my revenge for these films scaring me nearly to death all the time.  Mocking the "rules" of horror films (and later the sequels) was done in such a manner that I can appreciate it, and even laugh now when watching real horror movies. Plus, I LOVED Matthew Lillard. 





Best Literary Classic Spoof:

Young Frankenstein


Another Brooks film, this time starring the man, the myth, the legend: Gene Wilder. Seriously, the man should have a town named after him.  Also in the film is Teri Garr, Marty Feldman, Madeline Kahn and Peter Boyle.   The cast and ridiculous storyline make for excellent spoof.





Best Spy Spoof:

Austin Powers


Yeah, baby!  Honestly, I'm partial to the second installment, but the first one started it all.   The film turned super spy into man-whore with psychedelic views on everything (I loved the innuendos and name jokes). Mike Myers is comedic genius, and I'm hoping to see another Austin movie in the near future....





Best History Spoof:

History of the World


Yet again, Brooks (they might as well change the genre from "spoof" to "Brooks method").  There's really no way to explain this film -actually two, because there's a Part II - other than to say it's the history of the world, only really, really funny. Brooks' favored actors appear throughout the film, so keep your eyes open. 





Best movie no one realizes was a spoof (of romance movies):

The Princess Bride


I know!  If you asked ten people whether or not Princess Bride is a spoof, 9 of them will say no.  This film, starring Robin Wright and Cary Elwes, was intended to poke fun at the overly sappy and dramatic romance films that were being made en masse during the 80s.  One of the various taglines used was a pretty good giveaway:  "A classic fairy tale, with swordplay, giants, an evil prince, a beautiful princess, and yes, some kissing (as read by a kindly grandfather)."  Surprisingly it became such a hit without needed the spoof title that eventually everyone just forgot. 



Best documentary spoof:

Best in Show

This movie is one of the move hilarious movies ever made.  IF you like this kind of humor (which some people don't, although I'm not sure why).  The hubs doesn't find this film funny.  I maintain that he's lying, because otherwise I'd have to file for divorce. 

The cast of this film is a plethora of talent:  Jane Lynch, Parker Posey, Jennifer Coolidge,  Eugene Levy, Catherine O'Hara,  Christopher Guest are just a few.   These people: yuppie couple, white trash couple, redneck, gay couple, rich woman and female dog trainer - all head to a national dog show.  In the format of a documentary, the individuals are interviewed as they plan and prepare their dogs for the show and then we follow them all to the show and throughout.  It's HILARIOUS.  The opening scene is Parker Posey and her husband (the yuppie couple) in therapy with their weimaraner. The dog is distraught because she saw them having sex.  THE DOG IS IN THERAPY.  

I can't do enough promoting of this film.  If you haven't seen it, go watch it NOW. 


Best TV show spoof:

The Brady Bunch Movie


Have to include this movie, if only because it's totally awesome.  It's so ridiculously stupid that you can't help but love it.  Shelly Long (who I LOVE), Gary Cole, Michael McKean and Christine Taylor (Mrs. Ben Stiller) are four of the major players as Mr. and Mrs. Brady, Larry Dittmeyer and Marcia.  There's even cameos by Florence Henderson (original Mrs. Brady) and Ann B. Davis (original Alice).



Did I miss any FANTABULOUS spoof movies?  If so, let me know! 

And y'all have an awesome Labor Day weekend!

Passing on the reading gene

I love to read; I always have. I remember being a wee little one, even before kindergarten, sitting on the laps of my grandparents while they read books to me.    My most dominant memories from both second and third grade are of my teachers reading books to us young pupils. 

My mother has always been an avid reader, and fortunately she passed that love on to myself and my sister.  During summer breaks we used to trade books every other day.  We read just about every young adult fiction series there was:  we started out with The Babysitter's Club and Goosebumps, then moved on to Fear Street, Sweet Valley High (followed by SVU), Love Stories, Christopher Pike's Chain Letter books, etc. 

Eventually, as I got older, my tastes matured and I began to delve into deeper subject matter, but these series established a love of reading in me, and I hope my daughters will one day look back and have the same sense of affection for similar book series.  Of course, it all starts with the "baby" books....

These are some of my most treasured books from early childhood that I have already purchased in the hopes that my girls will love them as much as me:

The first book I remember being read to me.

As a first grader, I thought this was the funniest book in the world.

I don't know anyone who doesn't remember this one fondly.

My third grade teacher read this to my class on the first day of

school, and we begged for it every day for the rest of the year. 

I always thought Alexander was being a sissy.

I loved this little bear, and I thought it was amazing when they made a movie version of the book.

I wanted to go there, so badly.

The hubs isn't much of a reader, but his parents read him all of the Dr. Seuss books, which he still loves (and Mimi hopes our girls will love also).

What were your favorite books as a child/young adult?

TOTALLY AWESOME 100TH POST CELEBRATION

Wohoo!

Yes indeedy. This is my

Not the 99th, not the 101st. Nope, it's the Big Daddy of milestones in the blogging world, the big

Not sure what the weird stain on the one is....let's not think about that.

Okay, got that out of my system. It won't happen again, I promise.

Today is also coincidentally my three-year anniversary with the hubs.

I'm not going to get all sappy here because who wants to read that, honestly? I will say, though, that I am married to a wonderful man who is my best friend and a great father as well. Happy 3 years hun! LOVELOVELOVELOVELOVE!

Now, I told you guys that this post will be ALL ABOUT ME. So I'm going to tell y'all as much as I can about me in as little space as possible. A mini-autobiography, if you will. (I don't want you guys to be here all day, so some details will be omitted, obviously. If I miss something that you're just determined to know about me, ask me and maybe I'll tell you.

So are we ready? Yes?

Okay. Here we go....

May 1984. Cutest baby ever.

Lots of cousins. Small town. Church. Sunday dinners at Mawmaw & Pawpaw's. Lots of moving back and forth between Louisiana and Tennessee.

Me and sis still super-cute.

'Rents part ways. Step-parents and more siblings follow. Teacher's pet. Singer. Elvis impersonator (the Jr. High kids knew me as "that first grader who does Elvis." No lie). Jr. High - Baskeball and softball player. Gifted art. National Jr. Honor Society.

High school ROCKED.

Lots of school spirit. BOYS. More teacher's pet business. Football games enthusiast (we were undefeated District Champs senior year!). Spanish Club. Student Government Association. Singer in a Christian youth band. Drama team.

LOTS of hanging out at Starbucks and the lakefront with my friends. Greatness.

COLLEGE.

Got my first cell phone. (Yes, I'm that old). MORE BOYS. Slacker. Class-skipper. General waste of time and money for two years.

LET'S TAKE A BREAK AND MOVE TO TENNESSEE FOR A YEAR.

New friends (awesome people). Telemarketing job (don't hate me). New boyfriends (losers). Quality time with Dad & TN fam. Great experience.


Move BACK to Louisiana.


Katrina.

6 (SIX!!) weeks without power. UGH.

Lots of working (attorney's office) and going out with friends (karaoke, bonfire parties and the likes). Losers and more losers. Then, finally...

I...........I'm so in love with you.....whatever you want to do.....is alright with MEEeeeeeeeEEEE. 'Cause YOOUUUUUUU make me feel so brand newwwwwww.

Ahem.

Fireworks. Foot-poppin' kiss. All that jazz.

Lots of late nights, cuddling and general goodness. Eventual Christmas Eve morning proposal. Wedding date set for September 1, 2007.....

May 2007 - SURPRISE! - we're pregnant. (Well, I'M pregnant, but you get it.)

September 1, 2007

Best. Day. Ever. Honeymoon. Planning for baby. Planning for baby. Planning.....

January 14, 2008

Baby Girl #1

9lb 11.7 oz

21 inches long

Spent one week in NICU where the nurses gave her the nickname "Chunky Monkey."




April 2008 - SURPRISE - we're pregnant AGAIN!

Learn to be parents. Plan for another baby. Get better at being parents. Plan for baby.

December 16, 2008

Baby Girl #2

7lb 14oz

19 inches long

"Tinkerbell"





Get our own place (FINALLY). Adjust to being parents of two. Life's grand. Our kids are the light of our lives.

And, of course, y'all know that I recently started back at school after a six-year hiatus. Wohoo.

So, life story completed, I'll give a few little extra tidbits for your entertainment:

LOVES - LSU football, the Saints, 80s movies, humor, art, photography, family, roadtrips, walking on the beach at night, the mountains, history, writing, singing, music, Glee, crawfish, double entendres, the sound of rivers, thunder and rain, puppy breath, flip flops, Christmas, rocking chairs, lazy days, riddles and word puzzles, pad thai, concerts, theater, reading, coffee, my iPhone, sarcasm, corny jokes and pickup lines, tshirts, jeans, Robert Frost, Egyptian cotton, parades, sleeping in, learning and hanging out on my grandparents' front porch, the color pink.

HATES - bridges, extreme heights, spiders, ROACHES, Jon & Kate, the octomom, pretentiousness, liars, severe weather, screaming music, traffic, socks, wrestling, Oprah, dust, ignorance, Speidi, yellow traffic lights, vienna sausages and spam, the dark, Michael Myers, 'isms, hypocrisy, that Borat guy and Michael Vick.

Alrighty, that should about cover it.


Now, on to the

Yay! First, thanks everyone who submitted a story. They were all greatly entertaining, and hubs and I thoroughly enjoyed reading them all! You guys are awesome, and it's so cool to have blogging pals and readers who ACTUALLY READ what I post. I love every comment I get. Basically, you guys rock. So thank you.

So, after reading every funny/awful date story submission, the hubs and I debated, then he thought about it...

and thought about it.....

and thought some more....

He's actually a very deep thinker.

FINALLY he made a decision. So, the MOST AWESOME First Date Story Winner is.....

SERENA from I Left My Heart In London....

Wohoo! Yay! Yippy doo! Congrats to you!

Serena submitted the best - or, rather, WORST - first date story, as per hubs' definite and final decision.

Email me at jessicabparnell@hotmail.com to let me know which 80s tee you'd like, in what size, and also your mailing address and I'll get that right out to ya! Yay for 100th Post Celebratory Giveaway Extravaganzas!

Here's our Most Awesome Winner's First Date Story:


My first year in London. This guy from work keeps asking me out. I keep refusing because of some unfinished business I have (or thought I had) with the boyfriend back in Italy. A couple of months later I cave, and take up his offer to go for coffee on a Sunday afternoon. The guy had always been super nice to me, and he seemed like a genuine and serious guy in general.

Boy, was I wrong!?!

We meet up near my underground station. I take three steps towards him to greet him, he grabs ahold of me, pulls me close and gives me a full blown kiss on the lips. I'm like - OKAY!?? I thought you were shy!!!

But it doesn't stop there. We approach the zebra lines to cross the street, and while we are standing and waiting at the traffic lights he leans over and slides his hand down my back and right into my pants and panties. I turn around shocked and glare at him, biting my lips not to scream and make a scene. Trying to remain calm and be polite, I ask him what's up with the embarassing gropefest, and he says he hasn't been on a date in a long time and doesn't know how to control the excitement. I tell him we are just going to have a chat over coffee anyway, so nothing to be excited about, and that if he doesn't behave I'll just turn around and leave. He begs me to stay, he almost shouts to the point that people on the way stop to look at us and give me concerned looks. We get to Starbucks and we order our coffees and cakes. I sit down on the mini-couch, and he sits down next to me...just a couple inches too close for comfort. The cakes arrive. I take a bite of mine and he picks up a piece of his in his hands..only to go and drop it not down but INSIDE my top. Next thing I know his hand is down my tshirt and his fingers are insinuating themselves inside my bra. Why of course, he's JUST TRYING TO TAKE OUT THAT PIECE OF CAKE HE'S *ACCIDENTALLY* DROPPED DOWN THERE!

I'm angry and outraged, and needless to say our date ends right that second. It freaks me out so much I almost put out a warning about the pervert at the office. Just, eewwww!

So much for trusting seemingly nice guys!

That's all, folks!

Magnificent discovery

First, up...

I logged on to see that I've gained four new followers since yesterday.  Welcome!

Take a snoop around.  You can check out previous posts somewhere down there on the right....

OH and check out my 100th Post Celebratory Giveaway Extravaganza post and submit an awesomely funny/awful first date story for a chance to win a totally rad 80s tee!  DEADLINE IS MIDNIGHT TONIGHT (CENTRAL STANDARD TIME)!  The winner - selected by the hubs - will be announced tomorrow in my Awesome 100th Post. 

Anyhoo, I'm SO excited about tomorrow that I can't really organize my thoughts well enough to compose a post with substance (which is embarrassing, since I just won the "Blog with Substance" award haha).  I did want to share something with you guys that I didn't personally discover, but someone else introduced me to and it is so unbelievably amazing that you just HAVE to check it out!

One of the recipients of the Blog with Substance Award, Allie at You're Only as Tall as Your Heart Will Let You Be, posted her award acceptance the other night, and as her thanks to me included the video below to describe how she felt about ME at that very moment:


How fantabulous was that?!  I was hysterical - so much so that the hubs insisted on watching it, too.  Plus, how awesome to have that directed to me?!  Of course, after that I had to go check out this Mitchell Davis guy on YouTube, and he's ridiculously funny.  If you like that sort of humor......which I do.  Emphatically. 

Go check out his livelavalive YouTube page, but you can see another one of his video posts below that I found entertaining:


Seriously, I'm way too easily entertained. 

Anyhoo, that's all I can give you today, but keep a lookout tomorrow for my

TOTALLY AWESOME 100TH POST CELEBRATION

It will be all about me.  Everything you ever wanted to know about me.....and then some.

Toodles!

Movie Delight Monday

Ever get a hankering to watch a certain movie genre or feel the urge to have a marathon of every single movie of a particular actor?

Well, lately my hankering has been for John Cusack.

I just want to watch all of the movies he was in during the 80s - even the ones he just had minor roles in.

His sarcasm, quick wit and the way he mumbles when he gets nervous are some of my favorite things about him. Plus, he's a cutie patootie.

See?

So for today, MOVIE DELIGHT MONDAY will also be known as

Day

Okydoke? Alrighty then, here we go with today's movie pick:

Poor Lane Meyer. First his girlfriend dumps him for the captain of the ski team, which throws Lane into a spiral of depression and prompts various suicide attempts - all failures.

His family is really weird - mom likes to cook strange foods and dad won't shut up. They also go out in public in awfully hilarious costumes.

Then there's annoying neighbor Ricky and his awful mother, a boring job (although occasionally the food sings and dances) and the Asians who insist on racing at every redlight in town.

Lane really just wants to kill himself - well, that or win ex-girlfriend Beth back. Fortunately things get better when foreign exchange student Monique shows up.

Lane decides to ski against Beth's new bf and the captain of the ski team, Roy. With the help of Monique and his pal Charles de Mar (played by the hilariously disgusting Curtis Armstrong of Revenge of the Nerds fame), Lane finds that there's more to life than Beth, and possibly even happiness.

This is an absurdly hilarious film, one I can watch over and over again.

Enjoy!

P.S. Tomorrow's post will be my 99th, which means tomorrow is the LAST DAY to submit your hilarious first date stories for my AWESOME GIVEAWAY! I've received some really great stories via my blog, email and facebook, and the hubs will read over them all tomorrow night (the deadline is midnight CENTRAL STANDARD TIME so we'll include any up until then) and the winner will be announced Wednesday, which is coincidentally also our ANNIVERSARY. YAY!

I KNEW IT!

I have substance.

You know, I always suspected that my blog was one of substance (or at least occasional insight), but it has now been PROVEN thanks to one of the coolest chicks in the world, Nicole Miller. (I am so in love with you right now - in a totally non-lesbian way, though..........ahem.)

Nicole has awarded me with the

award.

See? I TOLD YA!

Is it ridiculous that I feel like sticking my tongue out and saying, "Na na na na boo boo!" to certain blog-haters?

I know I should say that we're all adults here, and now others will just respect my writing, and that should be enough, but I'm just not that mature. I'd like to rub it in a bit. Just a little.

So here's me rubbing it in a little:



I feel so much better now.

Anyhoo, there are a few rules that must be followed in order to accept this totally rad award, and they are:

•Thank the blogger who awarded it to you.
•Sum up your blogging philosophy, motivation, and experience using five (5) words.
•Pass it on to 10 other blogs which you feel have real substance.


So first up,

to Nicole over at It's All Random. She has special posts for each day of the week, and they're all great. My favorites are My 5 Mondays, YouTube Tuesdays and Sick of Them Saturdays. She's also great about encouraging her followers to check out blogs that she follows on Follow Them Fridays. Go check her out and I know you'll follow her, because she really does have a great blog!

Now for the hard part:

Sum up your blogging philosophy, motivation and experience in five (5) words.

This is really difficult, because when I started this blog, it wasn't with any particular intention other than sharing my opinions on various topics with hopefully a little bit of humor thrown in. I'll give this a shot though...

My blogging philosophy and motivation are basically the same, so I'd say ENTERTAINMENT, HUMOR, HONESTY, BOREDOM and LOVE OF THE ARTS (which is four words, but one idea, so hush). They all go hand-in-hand and so far have made for a pretty successful blog. I'm happy.

Lastly, I am supposed to pass this on to ten (10) other blogs that I feel possess REAL substance. This is super-hard because I follow a ton of blogs and they're all great. After much debate, I have decided on the following ten, who are blogs that I feel either have great general content (like those that are specifically books or movies, etc.) or are just such good writers that you can't help but lose yourself in their posts. Basically, these are the people who I look forward to reading the most:

Fantasy Casting

I Left My Heart In London

Jumble Mash

Long Distance Love Affair

Random Ramblings

The Bookworm

The Date Experiment

Without Obsession Life Is Nothing

Twenty-something Florida Wife

You're Only As Tall As Your Heart Will Let You Be

I know I've already given some of you guys previous awards, but hey - when it's good, it's good. So cheers to all of you, and me, and Nicole.May we continue to be substantial. Heh.

(NOTE: Nicole's blog is definitely one that I feel has serious substance, but since she was just given the award, I only thought it fair to share it with others.)

Oh and HEY - don't forget to mosey over to my 100th Post Celebratory Giveaway Extravaganza post to submit your funny first date story to win a totally awesome 80s tee!

Toodles!