Thursday, April 25, 2013
V is for Villains
Scarface. Hannibal. Darth Vader. Jack Torrence. Principal Rooney. These are just a few of the baddest dudes in the history of villains. Some are evil enough to give even the manliest man nightmares, and others are just hysterically awful - or awfully funny.
These are the best fictitious villains EVER, according to me.
Ledger was so disturbingly convincing in this role that no one was surprised to learn the actor had trouble sleeping after portraying the Joker.
Favorite evil act: Doing the "magic" trick to the mafia guy with the pencil. Eww.
Favorite evil quote: "See, I'm not a monster, I'm just ahead of the curve."
Favorite evil quote: "Uh, yes, the spyiiiiiider. Even the smallest bite from...arachnis deathicus... will instantly paralyze... ARRGH! GET IT OFF!"
The most ridiculously funny bad guy ever. Spends all of his time either frozen in space or trying to take over the world by defeating Austin Powers.
Favorite evil act: Busting out of prison with Mini-me after rapping with the inmates.
Favorite evil quote: "I'm one crazy mofo. I had to pop a cop 'cause he wasn't giving me my props in Oaktown. No? I heard that somewhere..."
Psycho single lady who "rescues" injured author then holds him prisoner because she loves him so much.
Favorite evil act: Hobbling Paul after he tries to escape. I can't even watch that scene. Once was enough.
A killer obsessed with the seven deadly sins. I could only watch this movie once. The scenes are so disturbing and the ending so awful I just can't stand to go through it again.
Favorite evil quote: "I admire you. I don't know how you found me, but imagine my surprise. I respect you law enforcement agents more everyday."
Psychotic boy murders sister, spends years in a mental institution, escapes and decides to take it out on young folks everwhere. For twenty-something years. That's dedication.
Favorite evil act: Well, the dude just never dies. What freaks me out the most by Michael is when he does that head-tilt thing, as if he's considering. CREEPY.
Favorite quote (since Michael didn't talk, I'm going with Dr. Loomis): "I met him, fifteen years ago. I was told there was nothing left. No reason, no conscience, no understanding; even the most rudimentary sense of life or death, good or evil, right or wrong. I met this six-year-old child, with this blank, pale, emotionless face and, the blackest eyes... the devil's eyes. I spent eight years trying to reach him, and then another seven trying to keep him locked up because I realized what was living behind that boy's eyes was purely and simply...evil."
Yeah, he ordered the Code Red. What about it? The ultimate B.A. himself, Mr. Nicholson.
Favorite evil act: His five minute rant during the trial.
Favorite evil quote: "I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a weapon, and stand a post."
The first time I watched this momma I decided I would never complain about my Mom. Ever.
Favorite evil act: The entire wire hangers scene.
Favorite evil quote: "NO WIRE HANGERS!!!" Duh.
Stu and Billy (Scream) - Matthew Lillard and Skeet Ulrich
I figured out Billy right off, but Stu was a surprise. He was so funny you hated to see him bite it at the end.
Favorite evil act: Opening scene. Brilliant.
Favorite evil quote: "My mom and dad are gonna be so mad at me!"
Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs) - Anthony Hopkins
Quite possibly one of the most terrifying characters ever, and he's not even the main killer in the film. THAT's talent.
Favorite evil act: Stealing the guard's face to escape.
Favorite evil quote: "I do wish we could chat longer, but... I'm having an old friend for dinner."