Friday, August 13, 2010
Fantabulous Friday the 13th
It's not just Fantabulous Friday today.
It's Fantabulous Friday the 13th!
If you're a paraskevidekatriaphobic - one who has a morbid fear of Friday the 13th - or one of those people afraid of black cats and walking under ladders, today's post is not the post for you.
In honor of this superstitious day I'm going to talk about fantabulously terrifying things (ie: things that scare the bejeezus out of me.)
Ready? Here we go.
This dude creeps. Me. Out. Halloween is one of my all-time favorite scary movies (although for the past few years I haven't been able to watch horror films due to my anxiety), but Michael Myers literally terrifies me. My friend Kiley dressed up as him for Halloween a couple of years ago, and even though I WATCHED HER PUT THE MASK ON, I still couldn't be in the same room as her. No, thank you.
I refused to watch this movie until I was about 22, because I absolutely believe it's possible for people to be possessed, and frankly that knowledge scares me. I'm not worried about being possessed myself, but just the idea in general.
I thought my age and secure faith would make me not afraid of this film. HA! Freaky stuff. When that chick came crawling down the stairs backwards..... I totally covered my eyes. CREEPY. Viewing it the one time was more than enough. I'll never sit through that one again. The theme music still gives me chills.
I know they aren't poisonous. I know they're harmless. But they TERRIFY ME. I swear they're the Devil's minions. I live in the country, and whenever it rains these evil insects inevitably make their way to dry land - ie: my house. I'll be sitting on the couch minding my own, and suddenly see one out of the corner of my eye. If you ever want to see me have a total freak out, be around when one crawls on me. I'll come unsnapped. Luckily my brave hubs takes care of them for me. Just don't ask him to kill a spider. (Note: I had to use a fake picture of them because an actual picture gives me the willies.)
Pennywise from "It"
I don't know about you, but I can't look at this image for more than a second or two before being completely creeped out. If anyone ever wants to know why people are afraid of clowns, all they need do is look at a picture of this guy. I'm not afraid of clowns in general, but this dude definitely scares the hell out of me. What's weird is that I KNOW that's Tim Curry (who I love!) under the clown makeup, but I can't get past it. My friend is afraid of all clowns, especially Pennywise, the doll from Saw movies and the clowns from Killer Klownz from Outer Space.
I could just say "incurable viruses" and be really general about it - because honestly there are a lot of scary viruses that could wipe out nations if they got out of hand. However, if you've ever read The Hot Zone (which I covered in recent post "Literary Lovin'"), you'd be terrified of this specific virus. Knowing the effects Ebola has on the human body will cure any desire to roam the mountains of Africa. Ever. It has a 90% mortality rate, and those crazy CDC people are nowhere near finding a cure.
I know there have been a lot of effectivly freaky serial killers/mass murderes in the history of the world, but this dude beats 'em all. He was so good at crazy that he was able to convince other people to join him in Psycho Land - he even suckered a Beach Boy into thinking he was cool. A BEACH BOY! That's talent.
I tried to read Helter Skelter a few years ago, and only made it about halfway through. I have never in my life been so frightened from a book. I still haven't finished it. I started having nightmares while reading the chapters that described the crime scenes. I'm telling you, this guy puts all others to shame. What's worse is that he was recently up for parole (again). Thankfully he was denied, but just the thought of him being free on the streets is enough to make me double-check my locks at night.
Lots of people are afraid of the dark. There are different reasons, like being locked in a closet as a kid, or getting lost outside at night, etc. I can tell you the exact moment I became afraid of the dark, and it wasn't due to a childish prank. I was maybe ten years old, and my cousins were watching Silence of the Lambs. When it got to the scene where Jodie Foster is in the dark house and the killer is walking behind her wearing night vision goggles, and he reaches out to almost touch her and she has NO IDEA HE'S RIGHT FREAKING THERE!!! Aaaahh. I had my first official anxiety attack, and ever since then I have been terrified of the dark.
Ah, you Mansons. You're all awful. Shameful.
I'm not afraid to see him on television (although he does creep me out in his videos). If by some strange chance I happened to be walking down the street and saw him walking toward me, I would go into total freak out mode. I mean really, what's the deal with him? Is he a dude just dressing like a chick? Is he a dude who wants to be a chick? Is it some weird fashion statement? WHAT?! Oh and what's with the eyes, man? Just stop it! You scare me.
Well, that's enough freakiness for one day. I'm starting to freak myself out. So, happy Friday the 13th people! Don't forget to step over cracks on the sidewalk!